Xion (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
attheclocktower) wrote2013-08-14 04:45 am
attheclocktower) wrote2013-08-14 04:45 am
Entry tags:
Individuation - No Forgetting
Note: This fic is considered "canon" which is to say both muns involved agree that it happened. Given that there's nothing for anyone to reply to though, I figured it was best to not spam the logs comm with this. But it did happen for all intents and purposes.
The events of this fic took place on Friday, the 16th of August 2013.
=============
She couldn't be with her friends all the time. There were still periods where, by herself, she would find herself tracked down. Jeered at. She came to dread visits to the bathroom, because Shion couldn't go with her. It was the easiest place for her to be cornered. She would have even foregone certain creature comforts if it hadn't been for the fact that cleanliness had it's uses - for instance, after being cornered by a monster and getting more than a little blood on her. Rather than risk attracting more monsters, she and Shion had agreed to split up, shower quickly, and meet up again in a half hour. Hopefully short enough they wouldn't be tracked down by too many of the shadow children.
Thankfully, the running water helped to partially mask the sound of their voices, of Roxas and Axel questioning again why she wanted to stay. Her desire to stay in the Tower, to fix it up and make it a better place, was one of their favorite topics. What about them? What about their future? Didn't she care? Did she care so much more about her friends here? But they weren't her friends, they didn't know her or care about her the way they did. So what if the Roxases and Axels in the Tower had come and gone so much? They would always be there for her, if only she hadn't ditched them and moved on to new friends!
Then came a point, to her surprise, right as she finished rinsing off, where their voices seemed to fall silent. She looked up, surprised, but relieved. Maybe they'd given up, since she didn't seem to be reacting.
She wrapped a towel around her middle, making to step out of the shower.
"Hello, Xion."
As she pulled the curtain out of the way, she saw that Roxas and Axel's shadow-children were still there. But there was a new one. A new voice.
Sora.
Setting her mouth in a grimace, she strode past him, heading towards where she'd left her blood-covered clothing, intending to pick it up and taking it back to her room.
"What, you going to ignore me, too?" he said, an almost sinisterly lighthearted casualness in his voice, "You've been doing a pretty good job of that lately."
Still Xion said nothing. She wasn't going to rise. She wasn't going to give Jason or whoever was doing this the satisfaction.
"Look, I just wanna know," Sora's voice seem to drill into her head. She tried to ignore it, tried to think of Shion, of Reno, of the real Sora and all of her friends in the Tower, "Why are you doing this? Why are you ignoring us, your universe, and everyone in it? You lived, the person who probably has the least right to out of any of us, and we didn't, and now the way you're repaying that is by pretending we don't exist."
"I'm not!" Xion protested, quietly, almost to herself.
"You are," Sora continued ruthlessly, though his voice was still light and carefree, "You keep telling yourself you want to stay here, but where does that leave the rest of us? Where does that leave me?"
He chuckled, the shadow child shaking is head in the mirror. "What makes you think you can decide to throw away my life? Our entire universe's life? Seems pretty selfish, don't you think?"
Xion whirled around to face the shadow child, her face set with a grim smile. "You can tell Jason, or whoever this is to cut it out. I know Sora would never say anything like that."
Sora chuckled again, "What, just because the one here's told you to find some other way to wake me up? Just because he wants you to find a way to live? But you won't even tell him you want to stay in the Tower. You don't think he'll understand. And you're right, he won't."
The shadow child shrugged, "Besides… What gives him the right to decide my future, anyway? He's not your Sora, I am. What if I say differently? What if I say I don't care what happens to you, so long as I can wake up finally?"
Xion's hands balled into fists, "I know you. I know Sora. I have his memories. I know he wouldn't say that. Even if he's the one from my universe!"
"Do you?" The shadow child's teeth were white white white as it grinned. "Are you sure? Universes can have some pretty big differences. You know that. And that's something you're scared of."
Xion froze. Slowly, a hand sneaked its way up and fisted itself in the towel she was still wearing, over where her heart would be. This was hitting everything - all of her worst fears about the future. The one problem that just would not go away. The one thing she could never feel sure about.
But one thing she was sure about…
"I know the person whose memories I'm made from," she intoned, impressed in spite of herself at how little her voice shook. "And you're not him. Or if you are, then the Tower did something to you, and I'm going to fix it. Somehow."
She made to walk past, but the shadow Sora was far from having his final say.
"You can't just walk away from this, you know. You can't just go out there and forget us again. Because that's the real truth. You can pretend all you like, but no matter how many times you tell yourself you don't want to go back, no matter how much you believe you'd rather stay here and make this place safe to live…" She could practically hear his grin becoming even wider. "You'll never be happy. You'll feel guilty with yourself forever, for what happens to us, to our universe, unless you go back and do what you know you have to."
That did it. Xion whirled around. Bunching up her clothing in her hand she hurled it at the shadow-Sora, who dodged, laughing.
"Leave me alone!" she shouted, turning and hurtling out into the corridor, trying to run from the voice and what he said, and knowing she'd never be able to go fast enough.
The events of this fic took place on Friday, the 16th of August 2013.
=============
She couldn't be with her friends all the time. There were still periods where, by herself, she would find herself tracked down. Jeered at. She came to dread visits to the bathroom, because Shion couldn't go with her. It was the easiest place for her to be cornered. She would have even foregone certain creature comforts if it hadn't been for the fact that cleanliness had it's uses - for instance, after being cornered by a monster and getting more than a little blood on her. Rather than risk attracting more monsters, she and Shion had agreed to split up, shower quickly, and meet up again in a half hour. Hopefully short enough they wouldn't be tracked down by too many of the shadow children.
Thankfully, the running water helped to partially mask the sound of their voices, of Roxas and Axel questioning again why she wanted to stay. Her desire to stay in the Tower, to fix it up and make it a better place, was one of their favorite topics. What about them? What about their future? Didn't she care? Did she care so much more about her friends here? But they weren't her friends, they didn't know her or care about her the way they did. So what if the Roxases and Axels in the Tower had come and gone so much? They would always be there for her, if only she hadn't ditched them and moved on to new friends!
Then came a point, to her surprise, right as she finished rinsing off, where their voices seemed to fall silent. She looked up, surprised, but relieved. Maybe they'd given up, since she didn't seem to be reacting.
She wrapped a towel around her middle, making to step out of the shower.
"Hello, Xion."
As she pulled the curtain out of the way, she saw that Roxas and Axel's shadow-children were still there. But there was a new one. A new voice.
Sora.
Setting her mouth in a grimace, she strode past him, heading towards where she'd left her blood-covered clothing, intending to pick it up and taking it back to her room.
"What, you going to ignore me, too?" he said, an almost sinisterly lighthearted casualness in his voice, "You've been doing a pretty good job of that lately."
Still Xion said nothing. She wasn't going to rise. She wasn't going to give Jason or whoever was doing this the satisfaction.
"Look, I just wanna know," Sora's voice seem to drill into her head. She tried to ignore it, tried to think of Shion, of Reno, of the real Sora and all of her friends in the Tower, "Why are you doing this? Why are you ignoring us, your universe, and everyone in it? You lived, the person who probably has the least right to out of any of us, and we didn't, and now the way you're repaying that is by pretending we don't exist."
"I'm not!" Xion protested, quietly, almost to herself.
"You are," Sora continued ruthlessly, though his voice was still light and carefree, "You keep telling yourself you want to stay here, but where does that leave the rest of us? Where does that leave me?"
He chuckled, the shadow child shaking is head in the mirror. "What makes you think you can decide to throw away my life? Our entire universe's life? Seems pretty selfish, don't you think?"
Xion whirled around to face the shadow child, her face set with a grim smile. "You can tell Jason, or whoever this is to cut it out. I know Sora would never say anything like that."
Sora chuckled again, "What, just because the one here's told you to find some other way to wake me up? Just because he wants you to find a way to live? But you won't even tell him you want to stay in the Tower. You don't think he'll understand. And you're right, he won't."
The shadow child shrugged, "Besides… What gives him the right to decide my future, anyway? He's not your Sora, I am. What if I say differently? What if I say I don't care what happens to you, so long as I can wake up finally?"
Xion's hands balled into fists, "I know you. I know Sora. I have his memories. I know he wouldn't say that. Even if he's the one from my universe!"
"Do you?" The shadow child's teeth were white white white as it grinned. "Are you sure? Universes can have some pretty big differences. You know that. And that's something you're scared of."
Xion froze. Slowly, a hand sneaked its way up and fisted itself in the towel she was still wearing, over where her heart would be. This was hitting everything - all of her worst fears about the future. The one problem that just would not go away. The one thing she could never feel sure about.
But one thing she was sure about…
"I know the person whose memories I'm made from," she intoned, impressed in spite of herself at how little her voice shook. "And you're not him. Or if you are, then the Tower did something to you, and I'm going to fix it. Somehow."
She made to walk past, but the shadow Sora was far from having his final say.
"You can't just walk away from this, you know. You can't just go out there and forget us again. Because that's the real truth. You can pretend all you like, but no matter how many times you tell yourself you don't want to go back, no matter how much you believe you'd rather stay here and make this place safe to live…" She could practically hear his grin becoming even wider. "You'll never be happy. You'll feel guilty with yourself forever, for what happens to us, to our universe, unless you go back and do what you know you have to."
That did it. Xion whirled around. Bunching up her clothing in her hand she hurled it at the shadow-Sora, who dodged, laughing.
"Leave me alone!" she shouted, turning and hurtling out into the corridor, trying to run from the voice and what he said, and knowing she'd never be able to go fast enough.